Oscar Begnet (pronounced ben-YAY, his father was half French Canadian) was relaxing at home in his house clothes, which during these hot summer months were a simple pair of loose cotton shorts and a thin cotton t-shirt.
It was important to try to keep cool during these times and let as much skin breath as possible. His mother taught him that and abided by this advice, bringing many visitors among his many friends growing up during summer vacation.
So be it. Oscar was decently dressed and helping his wife with their baby boy this day. They would go to the park and sit in the shade, just as soon as today’s reading lesson was over. They were reading to their son, Aaron Cullen Heart-Begnet, for at least two hours each day, calculated to one hour each at least. His wife Clarissa explained that it was important for them to both share all these tasks, essential for Aaron’s healthy development.
It was the height of the afternoon and Clarissa had just finished breastfeeding Aaron while doing a yoga pose. She had read how this was good for her posture, sense of inner balance and milk production.
“I need to rest now,” Clarissa said, laying down on the living room couch. “Try to read to Aaron and make sure the cat doesn’t bother him.”
“When should I wake you up?” Oscar asked.
“Don’t,” was his wife’s answer. She was soon asleep. Baby Aaron was on a play mat in the center of their living room with some toys. He was in the habit of crawling around among the toys, tossing one away, and then continuing on. Sometimes he would shake the toy, sometimes he would try to put it in his mouth.
Oscar cast a wary eye on his wife’s sleeping figure and then noticed that Cyrus, their cat, was near the edge of the play mat.
Aaron soon flung one of his toys, a collection of teething aids made to resemble a set of keys, over to within a paw’s swipe of the cat.
Worried the cat would take hold of it, Oscar stepped forward and bent down to retrieve the toy. As he got his hand on the toy, he felt a soft warm sensation on his testicles.
Oscar was so focused on making sure he reached the baby toy before it became a cat toy that he didn’t realize what was happening right away. He was a few inches from getting the wayward toy when the full reality hit him and, toy in hand, he lifted himself up as high as his strained legs would take him, but not before he felt Aaron’s curious baby hand reaching to see what this warm item was on his head.
Oscar realized that he had just teabagged baby Aaron, who continued to play on his mat as if nothing was awry.
Clarissa began to snore loudly. Oscar approached his wife, readying himself for a new purpose.